On Fear

Fear is a tricky beast.

Fear of the unknown. Fear of the undesirable known. Fear of not achieving your dreams. Fear of failure. Fear of a future you can't control. Fear of the dark.

Fear warps our perspective on things. It's like living in a fishbowl. Every threat around us seems magnified—the size of the giants looking in, the sound they make when they get close enough to tap on the glass and force their presence upon us. And we, we're each trapped in our own glass cages, powerless to escape the demons knocking on our door.

Fear is a powerful influence in our lives. In part, of course, because it’s instinctual. Fear keeps animals alive. In that sense, fear can be a good thing. It empowers us to make life-saving decisions. Run away. Hide until the predator's out of sight. But fear also limits us. It enables us to flee from pursuers but it prevents us from pursuing many things, often the things we want most.

I've felt a lot of fear lately. Fear that I won't accomplish my dreams. Fear that I'm spending too much time doing what I don’t want to be doing. Fear that our country, indeed our world, is headed in a bad direction. Fear of a government unwilling to act. Fear that my body won’t get its shit together. Fear of being alone.

People are always looking for ways to eliminate fear. Nonhuman animals obey their fear; humans regard it as a challenge that must be overcome.

Enter courage.

Whereas fear is a fairly universal feeling, courage manifests in a multitude of ways for different people. Its forms are infinite. It could mean voicing one's opinion in a crowded room or opening up to one particular person. Crossing a wobbly bridge or stepping into the ocean at high-tide. Starting a new job. Leaving a job. Facing a frightening procedure. Squashing a bug. Sampling a strange-looking food.

Often, we equate fearlessness with bravery. However, I believe that the braver ones aren't those who manage to eliminate fear, but rather those who feel their fear and act in spite of it. Alongside it.

Perhaps instead of trying to figure out how to get rid of fear, we should be thinking about how to work with it. Fear is not always bad. It's not always an obstacle. Fear is a tool. It lets us know when something important is on the line. It provides us with opportunity upon opportunity to prove ourselves. To be brave. Even if that bravery seems insignificant to outsiders, it feels amazing to those wielding it every time.

Without fear, we swim in circles with no change in the pattern. With fear, we have a challenge to swim out and meet.

And that, I'd say, is a gift.